In this selection of plays I have endeavoured to offer a wide variety of genre and something, hopefully, to suit every taste.
 

“I THOUGHT CABBAGE WAS GREEN” and “I HAVEN’T GOT A CLUE” (see Youth Theatre page) although written for children of school age, have been successfully performed by adults impersonating children.
 

A BRIEF PERIOD OF REJOICING

A sequel to "Chips With Vinegar".the action takes place in the MACRAE residence on 6th August 1945, a never to be forgotten day in the annals of world history. ALEX's experiences while a prisoner of war in Germany have left him troubled and emotionally unprepared to deal with the domestic problems he has had to confront on his return. While the war continues in the Far East, MAISIE's main concern is for the safety of her American serviceman fiancé and she soon loses sympathy for Alex. NEIL eventually realises that Alex's depression has deeper roots than he suspected and as he acts as confessor to him. MAGGIE as always, remains anxious for the unity of her family. At times extremely amusing but always engrossing, moving and disturbing. (See also "After Enola Gay")

SCDA SCOTT SALVER FOR BEST ORIGINAL PLAY 1997

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AFTER ENOLA GAY

2m 2f

Completing the “Chips with Vinegar” trilogy, it is new Year's Eve, 1950 and MAISIE has come home from America, pregnant with her first child but widowed since her G.I. husband was killed in the Korean War. Finding her mother MAGGIE in poor health, her father NEIL ageing and her brother ALEX frustrated by personal and domestic problems, Maisie is faced with the dilemma, emphasised by the historical events of the time, of whether to return to America or stay and accept the responsibility of looking after her parents. The writer seeks out the humour as well as the pathos of the situation. "Assured and well constructed": The Scotsman. (See also "A Brief Period of Rejoicing")

SCDA PLAY ON WORDS AWARD WINNER

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AGNES

AGNES, an elderly lady, has just moved into Sheltered Accommodation. The play opens as her daughter, LUCY and her grand-daughter, SHARON are clearing out her house where she had lived since a girl. They are looking particularly for a box of mementoes that Agnes has asked them to bring to her. They find the box, open it and in it they find aspects of Agnes’s life which up until now have been unknown to them. In flashback, the story of Agnes’s life unfolds. Reared by loving yet strict parents, JOE and JENNY, Agnes drifts into a disastrous marriage with DAVEY and subsequently becomes involved in a tragic wartime love affair. An emotionally charged play sharply contrasting present day family life with that of the nineteen forties.

SCDA SCOTT SALVER FOR BEST ORIGINAL PLAY 2002

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A NEW INTEREST IN LIFE

Christmas Eve and a prosperous middle-class family busily complete their last minute arrangements. Father, ROY TAYLOR, his wife, MARGOT, and medical student daughter, JENNIFER are preparing for the usual family thrash on Boxing Day. Margot's sister, CHRISTINE, arrives and the arrangements become a nightmare. A powerful play treating one of the most challenging and controversial of contemporary issues. Brutally honest, it makes no attempt to evade the unpleasant realities of life as family loyalties are put to the ultimate test. Nor does it offer any solutions; the audience has to come to its own decision. Also available in a Welsh language version AMSER I HAU, AMSER I FEDI published by the Drama Association of Wales.

DRAMA ASSOCIATION OF WALES AWARD WINNER

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CHIPS WITH VINEGAR

The action of the play takes place during the evening of Friday, September 28th 1938 against the background of momentous historical events as NEIL MACRAE, his son, ALEX, his daughter, MAISIE, and his wife, MAGGIE, live out their ordinary, everyday, working lives. Their hopes and ambitions are modest, but there is a sense of foreboding and uncertainty about the future. A robust, humorous and moving portrayal of the time. (See also "A Brief Period of Rejoicing" and "After Enola Gay")

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DAYLIGHT ROBBERY

The SMITH sisters, AUGUSTA, BERTHE and CHARLOTTE are accomplished artistes: sculptor, painter and writer respectively whose talents have as yet gone unnoticed. Believing that the way to recognition and success is through notoriety they decide to rob a bank with the intention of being caught and convicted. But it isn't that easy. With their mother, MAMIE, an able and willing accessory, they carry out a successful robbery; but MAMIE's long lost, criminal husband, SCURVY SMITH, together with his right hand man, LEFTY and his mob, had planned to rob the same bank at the same time. Scurvy's men are caught but Scurvy and Lefty escape and come in search of the spoils. Assigned to the case is the intrepid DETECTIVE CHIEF INSPECTOR HORNBLOWER and his able assistant, WOMAN DETECTIVE CONSTABLE SERGEANT. The plot takes many ingenious twists and turns as the girls endeavour to establish their guilt while Hornblower pursues Scurvy who labours untiringly in search of the loot. A hilarious romp from beginning to end.

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DESPATCH OF THE DAY

Completing the "Match of the Day" trilogy, CHARLIE FERGUSON and his pal, ANDY JOHNSTONE are once again formulating plans for attending another Celtic-Rangers meeting, but once again, fate, in the shape of Charlie's wife, ANNIE, puts seemingly insurmountable obstacles in their way. Charlie's daughters, LINDA and SANDRA are also making demands on their respective partners, JIMMY and KENNY but REV "TUG" WILSON, by means of a devious plan, appears to have saved the day, Tug, however, has been economical with the truth, and there is a sexy paperback doing the rounds. These are the rocks upon which Tug's plan might perish. Hilarious! (See also "Hatch of the Day")

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DUEL ENGAGEMENT

When KITTY MACDONALD and ALISON DAWSON booked the local leisure centre's function suite for their respective engagement parties they did not reckon on the eccentricities of the redoubtable MRS MORTON who booked them for the same date. This double booking gives rise to a number of comical and at times, uproarious situations involving both sets of parents, the supervisor of the centre, LAURA JACKSON, and her assistant, RENTON CHARLES. Described variously as bigoted, irreverent and sexist, this is an extremely funny and well crafted play - and great fun!

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FALLS THE SHADOW

Written to commemorate the explosion and fire at Chernobyl Nuclear Power Plant in April 1986 the play offers a glimpse of events as seen through the eyes of a working man and his family during the hours leading up to what has been described as the worst accident the world has ever known. The story is harrowing, the message chilling.

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FOREIGN AFFAIRS

ALEX and JANE MORRISON are preparing to celebrate their Silver Wedding anniversary and, with their daughter CAROL, who lives with them, are anxiously awaiting the arrival of their three other daughters, SHARON, LIZ and ALISON who are living in other parts of the world. Jane is particularly excited about meeting the men in her daughters' lives since it has always been her dearest wish that they should not marry local men. The arrival of each daughter brings many unexpected surprises for Jane as one hilarious situation follows another. A laugh a minute play, now a well established audience favourite.

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GRAN DORA'S BOX

When a group of squatters encamp in a show house, MICHAEL, their gentlemanly spokesman, explains that the purpose of their trespass is to carry out a strange experiment which involves transporting an old lady in a wooden chest out of a bedroom window. The bewildered staff: JULIE, the sales lady, FRED, the site manager, and OLIVE, the cleaning lady, agree to go along with the strange plan, but when the news breaks of a robbery the previous night, suspicion immediately falls on the interlopers. An 'inside' accomplice is suspected and there are many twists and turns until the truth is revealed in an unusually surprising and ingenious ending. Lots of fun and laughter guaranteed.

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HATCH OF THE DAY

The hilarious sequel to the popular "Match of the Day". LINDA has presented husband JIMMY with a bouncing baby boy and there is widespread consternation when he decides to name his son after the famous Glasgow Celtic football team of the sixties, the "Lisbon Lions" - all eleven of them! No one is happy about this, least of all the two grandmothers, ANNIE and GEORGINA. Linda's young sister, SANDRA and KENNY, her boyfriend are meanwhile conspiring to go on holiday together. All this plus the christening arrangements is interfering with grandfathers CHARLIE and ANDY's plans for the new football season. REV 'TUG' WILSON and his wife, MARY are drawn in to the plot as Linda comes up with a brilliantly contrived plan to compromise the situation. (See also "Despatch of the Day")

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KELLY'S EYE

Further adventures of JOE LEGGE and his football team. Joe has problems most team managers don't have. His goalkeeper is pregnant and his star player is hanging up her boots to marry a referee. To add to his problems, ageing, eccentric MRS MACK appears in response to his advertisement for a goalkeeper. LORNA's sign writing for CHARLIE KELLY's snack bar adds to the fun as does the girls' plan for a penalty shoot out against a men's team. As with "Legge's Eleven" there are many hilarious situations before Joe's problems are finally resolved.

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LEGGE'S ELEVEN

JOE LEGGE, the long suffering manager of his female football team is growing desperate as kick off time approaches. His striker can't head the ball because of an elaborate hair-do, his team captain is love sick and his goalkeeper is keeping a mysterious appointment elsewhere. Will he succeed in fielding eleven good women and true? What has become of the goalkeeper's jersey? How did the referee come to lose his yellow card? There are many hectic and hilarious situations before the team finally takes the field. The play is suitable for the young and the not so young alike.

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MATCH OF THE DAY

CHARLIE FERGUSON, a fanatical Glasgow Rangers supporter and his best mate, ANDY JOHNSTONE, an equally fanatical Glasgow Celtic supporter, are looking forward to the day of the big game, the 'Old Firm' derby. But Charlie's wife, ANNIE, has decreed that their daughter, LINDA, is to be married on that day. MRS COLLINS, the church caretaker, breaks the news that due to plumbing problems at the church the wedding might have to be cancelled. Annie will have none of this and the arrival of the new minister, REV 'TUG' WILSON and his wife, MARY, adds to the confusion. The situation is eventually resolved but there is a final twist in the tail. Now a great favourite, this play has been performed nationwide to delighted audiences. Alternative football teams may be substituted. (See also "Hatch of the Day" and "Despatch of the Day")

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MURPHY'S LAW

A man standing on the terracing of a suburban football ground remembers two people he loved and whom he associates with the surroundings: his wife and his father. He recalls a number of incidents, happy, sad, and at times gloriously funny, and remembers particularly the events leading up to their sudden and tragic deaths when crush barriers collapsed.

"A wonderful mix of pathos and comedy" - The One-Act Play Companion.

A RECIPIENT OF NUMEROUS AWARDS AND SCDA SCOTT SALVER WINNER 1993

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NOT ONLY FOR CHRISTMAS

LEWIS is a hard-nosed business man. His brother, BRIAN is, in contrast, a poet. Brian’s wife VICKI, is a high-flying public relations officer in Europe while Lewis’s wife, PATRICIA, is a stay at home wife and mother. When Patricia announces that she is pregnant for the third time, Lewis is anything but pleased. Lewis wants Patricia to terminate her pregnancy but she refuses. Lewis then suggests that they offer the baby to Vicki and Brian who are childless. Surprisingly, Patricia goes along with the idea. Then, in a series of flashbacks, we learn of deceptions, deviousness and duplicities which put an entirely different meaning on the situation. The four attractive character parts offer an interesting challenge in a highly entertaining and gripping play.

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PROCESS OF ELIMINATION

On the face of it, prosperous business man, ADAM FORTUNE, his wife, HELEN, and daughter, SUSAN, waiting for the arrival of intended son-in-law, RICHARD NEWTON, presents an ordinary domestic scene. But Adam is too tense, Helen too nervous, and Susan, in the circumstances, too cool. With the arrival of Richard it becomes apparent that all is not what it seems and Adam's business proposition to Richard is, to say the least, unusual. The offer, however, is one Richard cannot refuse but Adam's plans are thrown out of gear by the arrival of an unexpected visitor. Sinister, gripping and exciting, the plot takes many unexpected turns and has the audience guessing to the end. Note: The parts of Richard and the “unexpected visitor” are played by the same actor.

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SHIPS AND SEALING WAX

It is the year 1975 and sprightly octogenarian, MARTHA THOMSON has died suddenly in U.S.A. while visiting her daughter, JEAN, who has lived there since marrying an American serviceman at the end of the war. Martha's son, BILLY, and his wife, CATHIE, were killed during the war, Cathie in an air raid and Billy at sea. It was to Martha and her crippled husband, JOHN, that the task of bring up their grand-daughter, KIRSTIE, fell. For most of her married life, Martha has borne a strong, superstitious belief that an ocean going liner, built in the local shipyard, has brought ill-luck and misfortune to every member of her family. The play opens with Kirstie's recollection of the day Martha left for America and in a series of flashbacks, Martha relives the years before, during, and after the war when, one by one, each member of her family was affected by the malevolent influence of the ship.

SCDA SCOTT SALVER WINNER 1992

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SOAPY BUBBLE

MARY is worried about the whereabouts of her rebellious daughter, MARY BETH, who she suspects has gone to live with a married man. She is also concerned about her husband, JOE, whom she suspects is having an affair. Joe is displeased with his daughter's conduct but he has problems enough trying to convince his wife that he is working late at the office when he is in fact seeing his mistress, VALERIE. Valerie has taken Joe as her lover on the rebound from an ill-fated affair with JACK who now has a thing going with BETSY whom he has promised to marry. Valerie warns Betsy that Jack is already married and anyway, he is cheating on her with PAMELA. Meanwhile, SUSAN is watching every move with more than a passing interest. Confused...??? You will be until you sort out the bewildering goings on in this ingenious and inventive satire on popular Soap Operas and their fans. The surprise ending is guaranteed to leave the audience in stitches but more confused than ever.

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SWINGS AND ROUNDABOUTS

A man and a woman, each alone, return to the town of their youth and to a well remembered favourite spot, a public park. Individually, they recount memories of each other, of people they knew during the early days of World War Two, and of the events leading up to the overnight devastation of their town by enemy bombers. The sadness, the sorrow, the fear and the frustrations of the time are disburdened by the wit and humour of the time

SCDA PLAY ON WORDS AWARD WINNER

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THE LAST SUPPER

A play with an essential Scottish theme. It is Sunday morning following the event of the annual Burns Supper and JIM GRANT and his wife, PAULINE prepare to spend a quiet day at home. But things don't turn out as they had planned. Daughter FIONA, breaks the news that she is leaving home to live in London with her boyfriend, then son, DAVIE, announces his intention to emigrate to Australia. As Jim and Pauline try to come to terms with the impending changes, the question is asked whether a proud history is all we have to offer the younger generation.

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THE UNIFIED FIELD

Eminent scientist and UFO expert, PROFESSOR LAWRENCE HAMILTON together with his friend and colleague DOCTOR SARAH WELLS and her lawyer husband MARTIN, await the arrival of DOCTOR JANE BARRON and DOCTOR KATE LEWIS neither of whom they have met or indeed heard of before and who have practically invited themselves to meet the professor by claiming to have information of great scientific note. When the two doctors arrive they reveal that they are time travellers who have come to enlist Professor Hamilton's services on a scientific project of paramount importance. An imaginative work of science fiction which succeeds in remaining plausible and credible and the ending has a surprising sting in the tail.

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TO MAKE UP HIS JEWELS

A refreshing comedy of family life. Retired master joiner, PETER WALKER, finds that retirement brings greater demands than ever on his time, so underlining the old adage, "If you want something done, ask a busy man." Peter's plans are incompatible with those of his wife RENA and there are further complications when friends, family and neighbours make claims on his time and expertise. There is much to enjoy in this delightful comedy and apart from the two major characters, the cast is made up of small, interesting cameo roles.

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TRUTH, BEAUTY AND CONTACT LENSES

"Competence, like truth, beauty and contact lenses, is in the eye of the beholder." So wrote Doctor Laurence J. Peter in his treatise, "The Peter Principle." It is around this maxim that the action of the play revolves as it takes a satirical and, at times, cynical look at the modern day trend towards role reversals of the sexes. Business and domestic situations are examined with the conclusion that much to the chagrin of the male, the female is rapidly becoming the dominant sex. Like pieces on a chess board, the actors are moved from one challenging situation to another in this witty and evocative piece of theatre.

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UNCLE JIMMY

MARTIN brings ANGIE, his new girlfriend, to his parents house where he explains that he is keeping an eye on things while his parents, NORRIE and MEG, are off on a trip to France. They have in fact gone to try to find the grave of Meg’s older brother, Jimmy, (the Uncle Jimmy of the title) who was killed in France in 1940. The action alternates between past and present as the extraordinary relationship between Jimmy and Meg is revealed. There is a final emotional scene when Norrie and Meg find Jimmy’s final resting place and pay their respects to him. A touching and moving play which offers both pathos and humour in good measure.

SCDA SCOTT SALVER WINNER 2001

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WHERE IT'S DUE

ANNIE, JESSIE and VERA LOVE are three spinster sisters living together and although apparently respectable, they have in fact developed a nice little extortion racket with credit cards. The local friendly detective BOBBY BANKS uncovers their scheme but is placed in a dilemma when Jessie reveals knowledge of his clandestine goings on with his sexy assistant, WPC MOLLY ANDREWS. There are many surprises in this exhilarating crime comedy before the situation is resolved and the ladies renounce their life of crime. Or do they?

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